(insert Theme to Dragnet here...)

The story you are about to hear is true. None of the names have been changed because nobody is innocent.

My story begins on the night of Wednesday, February 8, 2006. I was in the spare room in our home, which we have dubbed “our office.” It was after midnight and I was reading a novel that a friend had recommended while J was sound asleep in the next room. Suddenly, I heard a loud CRASH sound and I put my book down. I walked swiftly, yet quietly, to the window at the top of our stairs and parted the curtains ever so slightly. I saw a man, dressed in black, sprinting up the alleyway behind the townhouses across the street. A black and white police car raced to the end of our street, presumably attempting to meet the sprinter at the end of the alleyway. I looked down the street in the other direction where I noticed three more identical cars, two of them with blue and red lights flashing.

I watched this scene for a little bit, attempting to fully gauge what was happening in my neighborhood and trying to think if there was a way for me to let the officers who emerged from the other end of the alleyway with officer police dog in tow know which direction I had seen the alleged perp sprinting. They appeared to still be searching for him and, as the streetlamps reflected upon their ruddy visages, they appeared dumbfounded. The canine, however, had not yet given up any hope of finding the fellow, as he was pulling in another direction, clearly urging his handler to keep searching.

I returned to the "office" and went about my business, wondering where the perp was hiding and whether or not he’d be found. After a few more hours, I returned to the window, where the scene remained unchanged. Shortly thereafter, officers emerged again from the alley. Again, with canine in tow, but no perp. I watched as a flatbed tow truck hoisted away what appeared to be an older model Mustang. I later learned from a neighbor that the car had hit the mailbox unit on the corner, which houses all of the mail for the entire street, and that the mailbox had been stuck up in a nearby tree.

I can only imagine the facial expression of an unsuspecting neighbor who may have slept through the preceding night’s commotion and walked to the end of the block the next day, hoping to retrieve that day’s mail delivery. At least I thought it was here…